Advocate vs. Coach: Two Paths to Student Success
by Theresa Jahangir and Ella Smoot
Imagine you’re the parent of a 6th grader, Sam, who has just started middle school after a challenging 5th-grade year, where executive functioning skills were already a struggle. Two months into the new school year, your child is failing most of their classes. You notice that missing homework and incomplete classwork make up the majority of the problem.
Each afternoon, Sam comes home exhausted—too drained to do much besides unwind on the couch with a favorite show. You’re not sure how to help, but you know there’s an upcoming IEP meeting and want to be prepared to advocate effectively. You’re also wondering whether your child might benefit from short-term, one-on-one adult support at home to help get back on track.
In this blog post, Ella, an executive functioning coach, and Theresa, an educational advocate, team up to explore how each of their practices could support this family—offering perspectives that are both complementary and distinct. While many other factors could influence this student’s success (such as medication, sleep, or nutrition), this discussion focuses on how each professional might approach it from their unique lens. Our hope is to help families identify which kind of support best fits their needs and understand why they might choose to work with an educational advocate, an executive functioning coach, or both.
Meet Sam
Sam (he/him) is a 6th grader three months into middle school. His parents just received his midterm progress reports, which show he’s failing all classes except Band and PE. Sam has an IEP and is diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety, which are noted in his IEP.
His parents feel that Sam is overwhelmed at school with the executive functioning demands of middle school—keeping track of assignments, getting from class to class, and independently managing all his supplies. They also notice that he is exhausted after school and unable to complete much homework even with their supervision. Sam has started saying that school isn’t for him and that he can’t keep up. He feels teachers push him to complete assignments in class, but he doesn’t feel like he’s understanding the material, and when he gets home, he’s too tired to do any homework.
Sam’s parents want him to feel good about himself and understand that his disabilities may be affecting his academic progress. They are considering hiring an educational advocate to help ensure the IEP better supports Sam, and they are also thinking about an executive functioning coach. They are unsure which path is best.
Sam’s teachers describe him as bright and capable but overwhelmed in class. They do not have time to sit with him 1:1 to complete classwork. They suggest that parents help him stay organized and remind them that “the start of middle school is hard for many kids.” Sam’s parents are worried about his self-esteem and have noticed that getting him out the door for school in the mornings is becoming increasingly difficult.
Theresa: The Educational Advocate’s Role—Navigating Systems and Rights
As an educational advocate, I work with families like Sam’s to provide guidance on how best to support him at school through his IEP. If his parents chose to hire me, I would review his current IEP and brainstorm what supports might help Sam succeed that aren’t currently in place. I might recommend accommodations to support executive functioning, time and task management, and anxiety, which parents report has been increasing and may affect his focus at school.
I partner with families to hear their child’s strengths and their vision for school, then help make that vision a reality through the IEP or 504 plan. I also educate parents about what supports already exist in the IEP and help them advocate to ensure those supports are actually implemented.
After our first meeting, I would likely recommend holding an IEP meeting to discuss updates. I would review the past IEP to identify ways to better support Sam in a neuroaffirming way. Do teachers need to adjust how they respond to Sam? Does he have enough visual support to access the organizational skills he needs in middle school? As we prepare for the IEP, we would request present levels of performance and determine if areas of challenge are best addressed through specially designed instruction (SDI) and updated goals. We might consider goals in executive functioning and social-emotional skills (like anxiety management), in addition to accommodations that better support him.
My hope in working with Sam’s parents is to foster a collaborative relationship with the school where Sam’s well-being is the priority. I would elevate parental concerns about his anxiety and self-esteem and brainstorm together how the school might best support him.
Ella: The Executive Functioning Coach’s Role
As an executive function coach, I work directly with students like Sam to help them build the habits, routines, and confidence they need to manage the demands of school and daily life.
When I first meet a student, my goal is to understand who they are beyond the grades or missing assignments. With Sam, I’d start by learning about his strengths, what feels hard about school, and what he hopes to achieve. Building that relationship and trust is essential because students open up more when they feel understood and supported, not judged.
From there, I’d help Sam identify and prioritize his most important goals. If everything feels overwhelming, we might start small by focusing on keeping track of assignments in just one or two classes. Once he feels successful there, we can layer in other skills like breaking larger projects into steps or setting up a simple after-school routine that balances rest and homework.
In our one-on-one sessions, we’d practice concrete strategies such as organizing his backpack and digital assignments, using a planner or spreadsheet to track due dates, and learning how to reach out to teachers when he needs help. These are the kinds of skills that aren’t always taught in school but make a huge difference in helping students feel capable and in control.
Our coaching sessions are grounded in trust, accountability, and structure. We’d check in regularly about what’s working, what’s not, and celebrate small wins along the way. Over time, Sam would start to recognize his own progress, feel less anxious, and gain confidence in his ability to handle school more independently.
My focus is on supporting Sam’s day-to-day growth and success, not on school meetings or legal advocacy. Through small, consistent steps and individualized support, coaching helps students like Sam build lasting skills, confidence, and independence both in and out of school.
Choosing the Right Support for Your Child
When your child is struggling, finding the right help can feel overwhelming. Both an educational advocate and an executive functioning coach can make a difference—but in different ways.
Start with an advocate if school supports aren’t being followed or aren’t effective. Advocates review IEPs and 504 plans, navigate the school system, and ensure your child receives the services they’re entitled to.
Start with a coach if your child already has supports but still struggles with organization, motivation, or missing work. Coaches build skills, routines, and confidence to help students manage school and daily life more independently.
Sometimes both help. Advocates make sure the system works; coaches help the child thrive within it. You don’t have to navigate this alone. The right support at the right time can make a lasting difference.
You can contact us here:
Ella Smoot, MAT
Certified Executive Function Coach
Theresa Jahangir, M.A.
Educational Advocate
info@theresajahangirparentadvocate.com
